Water, Water Everywhere (1 of 2)

The cure for anything is salt water;

sweat, tears, or the sea.
- Isak Dinesen

Before you tune out, no, this isn’t a post about how you need to drink more water. You already know that. This is a post about cooking with water. Everyone has heard the jokes  - “She can’t even boil water” or “he needs a recipe to make ice” – so we all know that the most basic method of cooking is with water. It’s also the healthiest and there are a number of ways to do it.

Cooking Style: Poaching

Works best for: Proteins

Upgrade: Add non-water liquids for more intense flavor

I first discovered poaching in my grandmother’s kitchen. My sister and I would spend the night with her occasionally and in the mornings, breakfast would always include poached eggs. As a kid I learned to love a runny yolk sopped up with toast or a biscuit. I didn’t learn to fry an egg till I was 20. Now, a fried egg tastes pretty good. But so does a poached egg. They both, as it turns out, taste like eggs.  Have you ever tasted cooking oil? It’s not delicious. Go to the kitchen and have a swig. I’ll wait…

See?! Sure, there is a distinct flavor, but no more so than there is in water. And no more than will be masked by the dry seasoning and other foods on the plate. So get rid of it.

Get a non-stick frying/ sauté pan (this is the last time I’m gonna tell you) and fill it 1/3 – 1/2 way with water. Put it on medium-high heat. Toss in your protein, and just like that, you are poaching! Cook it the same way you would in oil; turn thick meats over two or three minutes in to sear both sides, then lower the heat and let it ride. If it’s an egg, crack the contents directly into boiling water and when the egg white is completely opaque, fish it out with a spoon.  Once you’ve mastered basic water poaching, you can start adding other liquids to the pan for layers of flavor. When most of the water has cooked off, add citrus juice to fish or soy sauce to chicken.  Surprisingly, almond milk does something kinda magical to an egg.  Vinegar is available in a myriad of styles and can be added to any meat to add flavor as well as help tenderize the cut.

Cooking Style: Boiling

Works best for: Starches

Upgrade: Boil more than one food together to marry the flavors

Everybody here can boil water, yes? In case you need a refresher:  1. Fill a pot with water. 2. Make that pot hot. 3. Hide and watch. Now it’s just a matter of getting your food into the boiling water. For some reason, recipes have you measure out the water. This is only necessary if the end result is something that can’t be drained easily, like if you’re making oatmeal. But if you’re boiling root vegetables or pasta or whatever, just make sure you have enough water to cover the food and go. If the starch you’re boiling doesn’t naturally come in grain form (rice, for example), you will need to cut it up, usually into cubes.

Hint: the smaller you make the pieces, the faster they will cook.

If you’re making mashed potatoes, slice ½ -inch rounds and then cut those in quarters. When the water is boiling, toss the pieces in. Every few minutes, take a piece out with a long spoon. Try to mash that piece with a fork. When the test piece mashes easily, they’re ready to drain and mash. Coarse salt and a bit of margarine add a classic taste to this comfort food and make the end result creamier and more savory.  I like to add onions of any variety to the potato pot a few minutes before draining and mashing to blend the flavors together. You can do the same thing with sweet potatoes and apples or cous cous and cranberries.

Tomorrow, or possibly Friday, I'll discuss the final water-cooking method (steaming) and give you a recipe that uses all three methods at once!

Fryers' Club

Everywhere I go people ask: “I know I need to eat more yogurt, whole grains, fish, veggies, etc., but I don’t like the taste of any of those things; WHAT SHOULD I DO?” Or they say to me: “All my favorite foods are deep fried and I just can’t give them up; I’M GONNA HAVE A HEART ATTACK IF YOU DON’T HELP ME.”

OK, actually, no one has ever said any of that to me but I suspect it’s all true.

Well, dear readers, I’m about to solve all your problems.

What if I told you that you could work in more healthy foods, including those I just mentioned into your diet by eating more fried foods?

You’re thinking “NO! It can’t be done!”

Oh, but it can. The trick is, instead of frying our foods; we are going to “fry” them.

If the State Fair of Texas has taught us anything, it is that everything tastes better fried – and, often, on a stick. Now I know I posted just yesterday about eating foods as close to their natural state as possible and “fried” foods certainly ain’t natural. But if it helps you avoid eating fried foods and keeps your diet on track toward results, then this is certainly the lesser of two evils. Plus, if you are avoiding salt and cholesterol as part of a heart-healthy diet, you will be pleased to know that you can still have your favorite foods – even a full fish-“fry” dinner without the fat, salt or cholesterol that used to make these meals off limits to you.

To “fry” something, you need to start with the classic wet/ dry set-up. In traditional frying, the wet side is usually a milk & egg mixture while the dry side is flour or corn meal. For “frying” set up a pie pan with a big scoop of plain fat-free yogurt and a couple of tablespoons of soy or almond milk. The dry side is a second pie pan containing crushed granola or whole grain cereal flakes. I like Special K for the protein and the texture, but any unsweetened cereal will work. Then get creative. Take fish, chicken, veggie slices, whatever you like and drop them into the wet side for a few seconds, then transplant to the dry side to coat. Cover a cookie sheet with tin foil, shiny side up, and spray lightly with olive oil. Place the breaded foods onto the cookie sheet and then spray the top with olive oil as well. Bake at 400 till done – times will vary depending on thickness. (That’s what she said.)

Fish “Fry” Dinner

You will need:

Large tub of plain, fat-free yogurt

Box of Special K or other whole-grain, non sugar cereal

Almond or soy milk

Fresh or frozen corn (no or low sodium)

Broccoli slaw or Cole slaw bag mix

Fat-free tartar sauce (no or low cholesterol)

Fat-free Ranch dressing (no or low cholesterol)

Lemons

Fat-Free condensed milk (no cholesterol)

Red onions

Green onions

Tomatoes

Potatoes or Sweet Potatoes

Zucchini, okra, mushrooms or any other veggie you want to “fry”

Sea salt & black pepper (optional)

Cut the veggies you want to “fry” into medallions (round slices.)

Coat the veggies and the fish per the instructions above and put them into the oven.

Dice the potatoes and boil.

Heat the corn in a saucepan.

During last two minutes of potato boiling, add diced red onion.

Put warm corn, a heavy pour of condensed milk, and chopped green onion into a food processor. Grind for 30-45 seconds, until creamy but not liquefied.

Drain and mash potatoes and onion.

Toss bagged slaw mix with fat-free Ranch dressing.

Take “fried” things out of the oven.

Plate everything together, garnishing with additional onion and tomato slices. Add sea salt, black pepper, tartar sauce and lemons to taste.

Traditional fish fry – including deep-fat fried fish, creamed corn, mashed potatoes, Cole slaw:

900 Calories, 40g Fat, 2,150mg Sodium, 250mg Cholesterol (about half from the eggs in the batter mixture)

Fish “Fry” dinner – as shown

575 Calories, 2g Fat, 420mg Sodium, 30mg Cholesterol* (almost 100% from the fish itself)

*Fish, like all animal products, does contain cholesterol, however, heart/ cholesterol patients are encouraged to eat it because the Omega-3 content actually helps lower cholesterol levels in the body.

Another example of "fried" foods - zuccini slices & vinegar-poached talapia with a huge green salad.

Nutritional information calculated from info found at www.caloriecount.about.com

Before You Stick It In Your Mouth, Find Out Where It's Been

You just think you don’t like vegetables. The truth is, you’ve probably never tasted one. Most of us have had some frozen or canned or battered and fried variation. We try to choke down raw vegetables with copious amounts of cheese or salad dressing or other smothering sauces that strangle the taste of the natural vegetable. We mix them into soups and casseroles or use them to top baked potatoes and tacos. But when is the last time you tasted a clean, raw, unprocessed, fresh-off-the-plant vegetable?

Sure, it’s an acquired taste, but so is beer and most of you managed to work through that one.  So I challenge you, as Obama challenged Congress: “It’s time to eat our peas.” And our carrots and our corn and yes, even our cauliflower. Go to your local grocery store or farmer’s market and stock up. Buy things you think you don’t like. Try new things. Learn.

On your way out the door in the morning, grab two pieces of fruit and three veggies. Throughout the day, eat an avocado with a spoon; eat a tomato like you would an apple; satisfy an ice cream craving on a summer afternoon with frozen grapes. There are about 17 squillion different kinds of produce out there and most of them can be eaten raw. Keep exploring new tastes and odds are, you’ll find several you actually enjoy eating.

That’s not to say you should only eat raw food, but the goal is to eat your foods as close to the way they occur in nature as possible.   

Helpful hint: nothing grows in a can or a box.

Personally, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with eating meat, either, but the same rules apply. Nothing processed or injected or chemically-enhanced; avoid deep-fat frying and covering food in gravy.

Basically, don’t settle. You deserve actual food, not some synthetic approximation. If you need help getting motivated to eat whole foods, try watching this.

Now, I will admit, I am still working on a few of my synthetic food addictions - aspartame chief among them - so I don't mean to sound preach-y. Like I have been saying since I started this blog (lo those many days ago) let's do this together!

Buy Locally, Vote Globally

All summer, I have been watching workers build a Sprouts store very near my house. I have been anticipating its opening for a good few months, convincing myself that with this store within walking distance of my house, I would never again give in to an unhealthy craving.  Finally, opening day arrived. Of course, the place was packed, but I expected that. It’s sort of like the running track on the first day of spring – full of people who will never be back.  

They had a great selection of produce, which is what they’re known for. Unfortunately, a lot of it was still so under-ripe, it won’t be ready to eat ‘till Rick Perry is President.

I bought one nectarine, one pear, one tomato… just to test everything out. I got three green pineapples for $1 each. In about a month, I’m gonna enjoy one really delicious afternoon when they all ripen at exactly the same moment. I expect that when things settle down and the shiny newness has worn off, I’ll be shopping here pretty regularly. I even bought a second-hand bike to get me there.

Even if you don’t have a store like Sprouts near you, you can get a week’s worth of assorted fruits and veggies at almost any grocery store. Keep an assortment around and you will be inspired to find ways to use them. One of my favorite ways to work a slew of veggies into a single meal is with a vegan chili pie.

Vegan Chili Pie

You will need:

Sweet potatoes

Yellow onion

Red onion

Corn

Black beans

Pinto beans

Kidney beans

Celery

Tomatoes

Tomato paste

Cilantro

Avocado

Limes

Jalapenos

Garlic

Morningstar Farm’s Crumbles (ground beef substitute)

Jarred hot sauce of choice

Olive oil

Salt & pepper

Other dry spices you like in chili – optional

Dice sweet potatoes and mist with olive oil or cooking spray. Bake on a cookie sheet at 400 till soft enough to mash with a fork. While that’s going, in an enamel-coated soup pot on medium heat, add 2 tablespoons of olive oil and the ground Crumbles. Dice both onions and add 2/3 of each to pot. Dice tomatoes and add 2/3 of them, hot sauce to taste and a small can of tomato paste to pot. Add corn, all beans and jalapenos from a can. Mince and add celery, dry seasoning, lime juice and garlic about 5 minutes before taking the chili off the heat. Layer sweet potatoes, then chili and top with onion, tomato, cilantro and avocado.

I got the idea after eating Banter’s vegetarian Frito pie a few times and making a few alterations. First, don’t use Fritos. Duh. Put roasted cubes of potatoes, sweet potatoes, eggplant, or anything hearty like that at the bottom of your bowl. Then top with vegan chili and veggies. Leave off the cheese and sour cream. You won’t miss it. The chili recipe turns out pretty spicy and the avocado adds a creamy, almost sweet layer.

Use whatever vegetables you have on hand that are fresh to make this (and every) recipe. The ingredient lists are merely suggestions. The most important thing is to get as many different veggies into this (and every) meal as possible.  Actually, that's the second most important thing. The MOST important thing is that you never, ever vote for Rick Perry.

F%#! 'Em and Feed 'Em Fish (Heads)

At my gym, there is a group of women I refer to as The Persian Cats. I use the term ‘group’ loosely because they are never there together and as best as I can tell, they don’t even know each other. In fact, it may just be the same woman over and over again, haunting 24-Hour Fitness like the Phantom of the Opera. Anyway, just like cats, they are useless, think they own the place, have no attention span or sense of personal space and are constantly grooming themselves. I have seen one of them apply lipstick while sitting on a weight bench. They wander around in full make-up with their tails up in the air, serving no purpose.

The last time I went to BodyPump, one of them drug a ridiculous assortment of weights over to her station, leaving no weights for the last few to arrive. She spent half an hour prepping; laying out her weights, straightening her mat, stretching, drinking water, licking her paws. Then, three minutes into warm up, she decided it’s too hard or she’s afraid she’s gonna break a claw or something and starts packing everything up and carrying her borrowed equipment through the densely-packed class, forcing us all to dip, dodge, duck, dive and dodge out of her way to avoid getting hit.

Workout is not working out

I hate Persian cats and I hate The Persian Cats. Plus, that song with the lyric ‘I’m like a one-eyed cat, peekin’ in a seafood store’ is now stuck in my head. However, the idea of seafood did inspire today’s recipes, so I guess it’s not ALL bad.

Tuna Steak & cucumber salad

You will need:

1 6-oz. tuna steak per person

1 medium cucumber per person

Feta cheese crumbles

Olive oil

Vinegar

Slivered almonds

Lemons

Minced garlic, sea salt & black pepper

Heat a non-stick pan to medium-high and sear each side of a raw tuna steak for 2-3 minutes. Add vinegar and lemon juice to the pan and reduce heat to medium. While the tuna is cooking, peel a cucumber. Use the peeler to slice long slivers of cucumber into a bowl. Add vinegar and oil to cucumbers to taste. Turn the tuna over, add garlic, salt & pepper to the top, add vinegar if needed to pan. Toss feta and almonds into cucumber mixture; drain and plate.  Plate tuna steak next to it and serve with lemon wedges.

Deconstructed Philadelphia roll

You will need:

One salmon plank per person

Sticky or white rice

Fat-free cream cheese

Wasabi paste

Avocado

Lemons or shaved ginger slices

Sea salt & pepper

Poach salmon over medium heat till flaky (when a fork slides into the thickest part with no effort.) Reduce to warm and season to taste with dry seasoning. Cook rice according to package directions. Turn off heat under rice and stir in cream cheese and wasabi paste to taste. Plate together and serve with sliced avocado and lemon or shaved ginger.

Pretend those tomato slices are avocado slices

We can learn a lot from The Cats. Mostly, we can learn what not to do, but all of us can learn to eat like a pampered cat, including lots of fresh fish. On a personal note, I have also learned to control my rage when the little voice in my head is screaming “you’re holding a metal bar, just whack her; it would totally look like an accident.”

Recipe for Disaster

To say that I fell off the wagon last night is an understatement. I did a swan dive off of the wagon, set fire to the wheels and punched the donkey that was pulling it square between the eyes.

But more about that in a moment…

Know this: there will be setbacks.  Plan for them. Expect them. Have them, and then, recover from them.

My first week in the gym, I shot myself backwards off the treadmill in classic John Ritter fashion. It was quite elaborate – very flail-y. I screamed. I hit the guy on the treadmill beside me before landing in a fat, sweaty, contorted heap.

But I came back.

Since then, I have been in the gym four times a week doing one thing or another. Sometimes I lift weights; sometimes I do yoga. For cardio, I stick to the elliptical machine because it has a little plastic pockets that you slide your feet into, so I’m less likely to go flying again. The point is, I am there, working. And I have steadily lost inches, gained strength and burned calories in a way that no diet alone could possibly achieve.  

Speaking of diet, let’s get back to that smoldering wagon. Here’s the deal, I ate a burrito. I know. No one is sorrier than I am about the burrito eating. But if this public accountability thing is gonna work, I occasionally have to spill my guts and today, those guts contain burrito.

Last night, through no fault of my own, I drank 600 calories worth of Vodka and Crystal Light, drove through Taco Bueno on the way home and ordered a combination burrito with onions and queso. I know this because when I woke up, the receipt was in bed next to me, mocking me like a one-night stand now repulsive in the dawn light. Also, I had cheese on my face. Cheese. On my face. Wagon. On fire. Donkey. Punched.

I do not remember eating the burrito, nor its onion bits, nor the tub of liquid cheese that I apparently thought would round out this particular culinary experience. But I did. I ate the burrito. So now I must confess this sin in front of the same forum from which I have accepted so many accolades. I must hope that you will forgive me and continue to follow my story and maybe, someday, support me again. Most importantly, I have to refuse to allow this singular event – however hideous – to undo all the work I have done so far.

So I came back.

I had orange juice and a Special K bar for breakfast, and for lunch, I had salmon, avocado, cabbage, bean sprouts and carrots wrapped in rice paper from Mr. Chopsticks.

And I’m going to the gym this evening. I’ll stay away from the treadmill of death, but I’ll be there, working. My favorite class instructor at the gym always tells us “It’s not about the start, it’s about the finish; FINISH STRONG.” That really resonates with me for some reason, especially today, and it’s really the best advice I can offer anyone else. Well, that, and this little insider tip: cheese is not liquid at room temperature.

The Salad Days

When it’s 110 degrees in the shade, I start to crave cold foods at every meal.  Things like salads and cold soups are much more appealing to me than steaks and stews at the peak of a Texas summer. Salads are often the worst thing on a restaurant menu so you should always make your own. It was this line of thinking that landed me in the middle of my local produce section yesterday, starving, and looking for salad ingredients that satisfied my intangible yen for a dinner that would be “crisp” and “refreshing.” 

I had broken my own rule – don’t get hungry. And certainly don’t go to the grocery store hungry. It will go one of two ways, both of them bad. Either you will wander for what seems like days haphazardly putting things into and taking things out of your basket as various whims overtake you, your frustration steadily growing until you finally decide nothing in the entire store is worth the calories, abandon your basket in the middle of the house-wears aisle (how did you end up there anyway?) and leave the store. Or you’ll load up as much junk food as you can carry and undo the whole day. Nobody wants that.  But everybody wants delicious salads in the summer time. So, go in with a plan. A salad plan. Here are two simple options – one cold, one warm - to get you started.

Strawberry-Chicken Salad (cold)

You will need:

A bag of spinach

A bunch of basil

A pint of strawberries

A bag of pre-cooked chicken strips or chunks

Wash and drain the spinach and put into bowls. Stack several basil leaves together and cut in half lengthwise, then chop with kitchen scissors directly on top of spinach. Slice strawberries into rounds. Add strawberries and chicken to each bowl. I add sea salt to mine, but if you’re avoiding sodium, don’t.

Shrimp, Goat Cheese & Walnut salad (warm)

You will need:

A bag of mixed field greens

3 oz. plain goat cheese

4 oz. bag crushed walnuts

Small bag pre-cooked small shrimp

2 pears

Butter substitute

Minced garlic

A lemon

Green onion

Put the greens into individual bowls and set aside. Add 2/3 of the goat cheese and ½ of the walnuts to a small food processor. Heat butter substitute and minced garlic in a sauté pan; add shrimp. Cube the pears. When the shrimp are piping hot, remove from heat and put on a plate, reserving as much liquid in the pan as possible. Add the pears to the sauté pan and warm till they’re soft, but not mushy. Add 2/3 of the softened pears to the shrimp plate and 1/3 to the small food processor, along with any liquid left in the pan. Add the juice of one lemon to food processor and pulverize to make salad dressing. Top the greens with the hot shrimp & pears – greens will wilt a bit.  Spoon dressing over each salad and then top with the remaining goat cheese, crumbled, and the remaining walnuts. Add raw green onion slices to the very top and serve warm.

It’s difficult to portion out calories and fat and all without exact quantities. My best advice is to look at what is in the entire container of goat cheese or walnuts or whatever, get a total for all of it and then divide by how many servings you make from it. Salad greens and fruit are free. Chicken has a shocking amount of sodium. Avoid animal products (meat, eggs, talons) to avoid cholesterol.  Mushroom slices are pretty good in the first salad if you don’t do chicken.

Drink water. Especially during the salad days.  If you don’t like the taste of plain water, a few slices of cucumber makes a glass of ice water very “crisp” and “refreshing.”

U, D, L, L, R, U, D, R, R, L (cheats)

There’s only one real trick to weight loss: find what works for you. Some people are willing to work out all day as long as they can eat whatever they want; other people are content to eat almost nothing as long as they don’t have to move too much. For some, working out with a buddy is motivational and others would be too afraid of how they look to work out in front of anyone they know. Most people advise working in a cheat day or free day every so often to help you stay on track. Personally, I think this is terrible advice. First of all, I cannot backslide into the mindset that food is a reward, or that toxic, processed non-foods have any place in my life anymore. For me, the only thing that motivates me to do good work tomorrow is doing good work today.

That being said, I of course acknowledge that everybody is different. If eating a deep fried Oreo on a stick every once in a while keeps you on track the other 99% of the time, then by all means, EAT THE DEEP FRIED OREO ON A STICK! I’m just saying that personally, I wouldn’t know where to draw the line. If I eat the DFOOAS, should I round out the meal with a burger and fries? Is the whole day shot? The week? The first step is the hardest and I just can’t set myself up to take it over and over or I’ll give up. I need the momentum.

But, of course, I crave things. I crave burgers and fries and even the occasional DFOOAS. So I have found ways to satisfy the craving with completely healthy stuff. Here are two of my favorites: a Falske (literally translates to ‘fake’ in Danish and is a fake Danish) and The Healthy Bastard (my version of a jaw-dropping, heart-stopping feat of burger awesomeness, The Magnificent Bastard.

Falske ingredients:

Whole wheat (double fiber) English muffins

Fat-free cream cheese

Low-sugar fruit spread of choice

I’m gonna give you enough credit to assume you can figure out how to assemble the above ingredients to get this:

As shown, including black coffee, 115 calories, 1 g fat, 135mg sodium, no cholesterol

For my money, there is no better-tasting burger than the Magnificent Bastard at Andy’s. Add a side of Super Fries and it’s an ideal last meal. Trouble is, it really would have been.  If I had kept eating them, one of those little bastards would have done me in. Just not worth it when there is a healthy alternative (and there always is.)

Healthy Bastard ingredients:

Whole wheat hamburger buns

Morningstar Spicy black bean burgers

Eggs

Fat-free mayonnaise or mayo with olive oil

Tabasco or hot sauce of choice

Red onion slices

Tomato slices

Lettuce shreds

Russet potatoes

Green onion

Sodium-free seasoning

Non-stick pan, boil water, insert burger patty, lather, rinse, repeat.

Cube the potatoes, toss in a LITTLE BIT of olive oil, roast at 350 degrees till one will mush easily with a fork.

While that’s going, slice the veggies and mix equal parts mayo and hot sauce.

Toss the potatoes a bit just by shaking the pan around, add the dry seasoning and switch to broil for the last 5 minutes-or until crisp.

While that’s going, slice the veggies and mix equal parts mayo and hot sauce.

When the burger patty is warm, take it off the heat and poach an egg in the same water.

Add green onion slices to potatoes just before serving. They’re super thin and will dry up in a matter of minutes inside a hot oven.

Put mayo/ Tabasco mix on one side of the bun, and on the other, load up veggies first, then black bean burger patty, then egg.

Add a side of potatoes and it should look something like this:

As shown, we’ve got about 500 calories, 5g fat, 300 mg sodium, 1,000,000 mg cholesterol

If you’re watching your cholesterol intake, ditch the egg and add avocado for a heart-healthy alternative that isn’t too dry.

These should help you stay on track the next time you try to convince yourself you deserve a cheat day. What you deserve is to be proud of the choices you make. On that note, there is one more trick that worked for me: public accountability. Between facebook and this blog, I am telling everyone I know – and a bunch of people I don’t – my measurements, everything I eat and every time I go to the gym. The support is amazing and the fear of letting all those people down is enough to keep me from eating the chocolate cake I think I want so badly.

There will always be people who want to tell you why their way is better. Health is like religion that way. In both cases, find what works for you and DO IT.

One Fish, Two Fish, You Can Do Fish

Can’t go vegan but sick of chicken? Do yourself a favor and buy a big bag of frozen fish.  I was scared at first, too. Heard Gordon Ramsay yell at too many contestants to ‘piss off before you kill someone’ when they brought him fish that wasn’t cooked all the way through.

Cook it a few times, though, and you’ll start to get a feel for when it’s done. First timers can wade slowly into the world of seafood (see what I did there?) by starting with recipes that call for the fish to be served flaked, instead of as a fillet or steak. That way, you can tear it apart, right in the pan, and if it’s not done, give it a few more minutes. The fish tacos below are just such a dish. And they’re freakin’ delicious.

Here’s what you’ll need:

1 Bag mahi mahi, fillets, frozen

1 package corn tortillas

1 avocado

3 Roma tomatoes

1 red onion

3 stalks green onion

1 can low-sodium black beans

1 package broccoli slaw mix

1 jar of salsa (I’ll give you a hella-good recipe for home-made soon)

Salt-free fajita seasoning

Grab your trusty non-stick sauté pan and bring water to a boil. We’re gonna poach a LOT, so this is good practice. Place one fish fillet per person in the water. While that boils down, chop all your veggies and put the black beans on low heat to simmer. When the water in the fish pan is almost gone, turn the fish over and add the dry seasoning to the fish and to the beans. Wrap tortillas in foil and toss them in a 350-degree oven for a few minutes. When all liquid is gone from the pan, flake the fish with a fork. If it needs more time, add a bit of water and check every minute or so. When the fish is ready, turn off all the heat and assemble everything as you like it.

That’s it – a home-made, healthy, fish dinner (including NINE veggies) that tastes so good even kids will eat it.

As shown, that’s about 400 calories, 5 grams fat, 75mg sodium, and no cholesterol. In fact, the avocado and the fish actually lower your bad cholesterol, so eat up.

If you don’t like mahi-mahi, remember, there are lots of fish in the sea…

Ditch Your Pants, Dance & Give Eggs a Chance

At my thinnest, I played a secret game with myself. There was only one objective to this game: to be able to take a particular pair of jeans off without unbuttoning them. It's weird, I know. But they were the jeans that fit me when I first started losing weight and to be able to take them off still zipped and buttoned felt like a measure of success. It encouraged me. So I did it. I played the game. I wore the jeans in public, even to work. Then I would go into the bathroom and see if I could still 'pull it off.' I have, on more than one occasion done a little happy dance in a public restroom with those jeans around my ankles, still buttoned.

Now, at this point, you're likely thinking "What the hell? Are you ever gonna talk about food in this food blog?"

Well, just settle down, you.

Yes, yes I will. Today, in fact. But first I want to brag and tell you that I did that little happy dance again this morning. Different jeans; same dance. This time, no anorexia required.

I am not an expert or a doctor or an athlete or even a terribly bright person. But I know what's working for me. I know what's making me dance pantsless. And I am going to share it with you in the hopes that you, too, will one day do a partially nude dance of glee at the way your body is changing. (I'll teach you the dance moves in a later post.)

So here we go.
Seems logical to start with breakfast. Here's one you can try tomorrow morning.

Grocery list:
Whole wheat (double fiber) English Muffins
Eggs
Pre-packaged pico de gallo (or Roma tomatoes, white onion, fresh jalapenos and cilantro)

Saturday Morning Breakfast
This is my standard Saturday morning breakfast. I get up crazy early, drink some orange juice, and go to the gym to do Body Pump. After the class, it's still too early for lunch, but I am ravenous and need protein, so I make eggs. AWESOME eggs. I cannot say enough good stuff about eggs. Egg whites, in particular, are like the perfect food. Even if you are a heart patient, never stop eating eggs, just ditch the yolks.

In a non-stick frying pan (You don't have one? GET ONE.) bring water to a boil. Crack open the eggs and drop them straight in to poach. If you want just the whites, you can have twice as many. If you keep the yolks, use a spoon to pick up some of the boiling water and splash it onto the yolks - they cook more slowly because they're thicker, so get them hot on both sides. If you are not opposed to slightly runny eggs, this recipe tastes better if you only cook the eggs to about over easy. There is no butter or oil or anything, so it can be dry if you over cook the eggs.


Put the cooked eggs on an open-faced English muffin and top with pico. Season with sea salt or sodium-free substitute. I added a bit of basil because it was ready to come out of the garden. The finished product should look something like the picture below. And yes, it will totally taste better if served atop the latest issue of Southern Living.

With 2 whole eggs: 275 calories; 10g fat; 12 g protein; off-the-charts cholesterol

With 4 egg whites: 200 calories; 2g fat; 16g protein; no cholesterol

So, the egg-white route is clearly the better choice. It surprised me to learn you don't lose too much of the protein by eating just the whites and I promise if you put enough pico on there, you'll never miss the yolks.

Give that a whirl and let me know what you think. Comments, criticisms, questions and discoveries are always welcome in the comments section. Let's do this together.

The Rules

In my kitchen there is a sign that reads:

Eat Whole ~ Live Well

Make Beautiful Trash

While this mantra is fairly subjective, it pretty much sums up my philosophy on life. For those, like me, who like specific instructions, I submit these 10 commandments:

1. Don't get hungry - Getting hungry makes you tired and cranky and it gives you a headache. Hunger makes you less able to make smart choices or even think straight. It makes you more likely to say "f#%* it" and eat the chocolate cake. Getting hungry ruins everything. Don't do it.

2. Drink water - Duh. You knew this, right? But you're not doing it.

3. MOVE - Fitness, health, even weight loss is SO much more about moving more than it is about eating less. Park far away from things. Stand whenever you can. Walk. Bike. Take the stairs. Pick up heavy stuff.


4. Don't eat crap - Again, duh. But if you're not cooking three meals and two snacks per day in your home kitchen, you really have no idea what you might end up consuming. The big stuff is easy: no bacon double cheeseburgers. But did you know there are 1,400 calories in a Fajita Salad at a major restaurant chain?

5. Don't give up your favorite foods - Adapt. It is what has kept civilization going for thousands of years. That Fajita Salad I just mentioned? You can order the actual fajitas from the same chain for 950; hold the cheese & sour cream for 700; hold the cheese, sour cream and tortillas for 375. There are ways to make ALL of your favorite foods healthy and delicious. I will show you those ways here. I take requests.

6. No recipes. I don't believe in them. Eat whatever is fresh and local. Eat things together you've never tasted together before. Eat what you're craving, just prepared in a more thoughtful way. Please don't ask me for traditional recipes here; I'm not writing this stuff down and I drank my short-term memory away a long time ago.

7. Don't weigh yourself - There is almost zero value in weighing yourself. Ever. It's a rough estimate at best, it fluctuates constantly, it is not a measure of health, fitness, or life expectancy. It goes up when you replace fat with muscle. It discourages you. Pick up your bathroom scale 50 times with each hand instead of standing on it and you'll make better use of it.


8. Measure your progress - Measure yourself at the chest, widest waist, smallest waist, widest hips, butt and around both thighs. Add those numbers up. Write it down. Wait a week. Repeat. Notice trends. Set goals. Meet them.

9. MOVE AGAIN

10. Read more - No matter how much you're reading now, you should read more. That one's not so much about the eating whole advice as it is the living well advice. When you're living well, you will make beautiful trash. Try it.

Back Story

I was born and lived the first dozen years of my life in the suburbs of New Orleans – a city that ran an ad campaign in the ‘80s to promote tourism that featuring the tag line: “Others may only eat to live, but in New Orleans we live to eat!” Yeah. So, that’ll give you some idea of what my earliest ideas about food were. Food was everywhere, all the time. Food was both punishment and reward. Food was celebrations and holidays and funerals and comfort. Food was the way I bonded with my father as he taught me to flip the pancake when I could count 100 tiny bubbles in the batter. Food was the way families in the South showed love and, more importantly, hospitality. It was a measure of status, of worth; it was, in fact the singular reason for being, if you believed the TV.

I never considered food as toxic or healing, never as fuel for the work my body would do. In fact, I spent a great deal of time avoiding work. That’s how I got fat. Not crazy-fat. Not “Whoa, look at HER!” fat. Still, fatter than I was told was beautiful. Fatter than I was told was healthy. Fatter than I liked myself being. So I got skinny. Not crazy-skinny. Not “Look at that bitch” skinny. Still, plenty skinnier than I had ever been. But I didn’t do it right. I starved myself and ate bizarre manufactured non-foods. I challenged myself to see how long I could go without eating. I contend I did more damage to my body during that time than 1,000 cheeseburgers ever could have done.

This time, I’m doing it right.

I still love food. The only thing I like better than food is taking down the system from the inside. So I figured out how to enjoy my food - not for a moment and then regret it, and not for the control I could have over it – one day at a time. I found ways to make food healthier, even healing, while still tasting good. I discovered that absolutely anything can taste good when it is prepared well and absolutely anything can be harmful in excess.

I have learned a lot - the biggest lesson being that healthy living is not as difficult or mysterious as we have been led to believe - and I want to share it with you in the hopes that eating thoughtfully becomes the norm in our every-day lives.

So there’s the back-story. Common? Sure, but it’s why I’m doing this and I figured you should know. This is guaranteed to be your least favorite entry of this blog. Stay with me. From here on in it’s all jokes and pretty pictures, I promise.